2017-11-13

Parenting should come with a manual

Fun drinking game for patents

Fun drinking game for patents

Babies should be delivered with Haynes style manuals, with yearly updates and special add on instruction, bounus additions, for kids who decide to confuse parents even further with their new and exciting kid goings on.

My boy is now 11 and I admit that it’s not been all smiles and rainbows. There have been a few of those “WTF?!” moments with him growing up, but with some wise words from friends and family, I have muddled through and don’t think I’ve done too bad a job.  I mean, I’m a divorced, single parent with not one, but two, YES TWO, auto immune illnesses, self employed and a crazy cat lady to boot, the fact I shower most days is a win! But my boy is my rock, and although he can scare the shit out of me and wind me up like a spinning top, in equal measures, he is the thing I am most proud of in life and how I have raised him.

Until today.

Today I felt like a shit mum.

Today, I was that mother who bribed her son to get in the car to go to school.

Today, I was that mother who had her child beg, sob, and cling onto her in fear because he had to go to school.

Today, I was that mother who doubted if I was doing the right thing.

Thinking child

Leaving the school with tears in my eyes, just like my son’s, I wanted to go back in, take him by the hand and run away, well maybe running is not quite the way to describe how it would be, running in a sloth like manner, maybe. I sat in the car and cried. I went for coffee and I cried, I went to a friend’s for moral support, and well almost cried (I got distracted).

I loathed going on the afternoon school run, not knowing if he would come out of school smiling or resenting me for leaving him. This is where i wanted the manual. For tip and tricks on how to deal with pre-pubescent boys and not wanting to attend school, turn to page 874.  Sadly there were no smiles. More tears, finger pointing, excuses and the very normal teenage form of communication – the shrug – were the only things I got in the car on the way home. But as soon as that uniform came off, I had my boy back again.

For mood swings refer to the section on Teenagers, out in 2 years time.

We have spoken and had words tonight about school, but I fear by 8am tomorrow morning, when the uniform goes back on, that all the words and agreements we made and the help the school is providing, will have fallen on deaf ears.

The school have been very helpful and have encouraged my son to speak about the issues which have stemmed from bullying in school. It’s crucial to make sure you take notice of the little behavioural changes in your children so to act on them with the right methods through the school.

Sticks and stones may break my bones but words hurt just as fucking much and cause more issues later on in life with mental scaring. I wish that we were told this growing up and not told to ignore name calling.

Stand up to bullies.

Love, hugs and all the wine

Vx

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