2016-08-16

When being alone is hard work

If you have children you will know that having alone time as a parent is worth its weight in gold. It’s blissful, the quiet, no questions asked time out where you do not have to worry – although you do, you are a parent after all, and that is our job.
If you, like I do, have a split family unit where parents have separated or divorced, you will know that alone time can be a wonderful thing when they go off to their other parents house and you have the place to yourself. The quiet, the lie ins,  the bathroom time which will not be interupted and the cup of tea which you can drink while it is still hot. 
But then, there are exceptional times like now, there are the summer holidays. The extended periods of time where kids are away, the weeks can drag by as they are not being taken over with pokemon hunting, soft play dates and countless hours of kids TV.  And this my friends,is where I am now. I am in that parenting limbo, the void of nothing. 
Yesterday Nathan went off to his dad’s as they are jetting off to sunny Spain this week. I kissed my mini me goodbye and got the promise of a postcard happy that he will be having an amazing time by the pool. Once he was gone I did all the things I had been wanting to do, I had a long bath, I read my book, I put my feet up and then, after only a few hours, I realised that I missed him.  I missed him like crazy. The background noise of Youtube videos and the xbox, the laughter and the noise of a happy home. The place was quiet. Like, really quiet.  
It was worse this morning waking up to an empty house. The kitten even was confused when her play mate was not to be found under the mounds of blankets and duvets, though she did have a good look and cried a little as if to ask “where is he?”  Friends say that it must be fantastic having no children about for two weeks, and I am guessing to most it would be, but as I am single, and a crazy cat lady by most accounts, being alone sucks. 

Vicky and nathan the Motherhood

So, I need a plan to manage the next two weeks without going slightly mad in the process.  Here are my first lot of ideas…

Go to the cinema 

Going alone to the cinema is something I have never done, but it actually sounds like a good idea. I mean even if you go with someone, you spend the best part of two hours ignoring each other, so going alone seems sensible really. 

Sleep

Sleep and sleep lots.  Topping up on sleep is a good as when we are parents we never seem to get enough. 

Sleep and rest

Don’t cook 

Cooking for one is a lonely job and I have tried it. I prefer people to enjoy food with me than eat alone.  I have however found that being savvy with Marks and Spencer meal deals and offers, you can eat like a king for the week for around £40 and still come out with a couple of bottles of wine.  Bargain! 

Go on a date

I have decided to dip my toe in the dating pool again. It gives a bit of entertainment and a break in the monotony of life. Plus hopefully I will have some new dating disaster stories for you!

Long drives 

Driving is my escape. I love it. Music on and go on a mini adventure. As I have The Lakes on my doorstep it’s perfect to go and explore, find a coffee shop and take in a new place. 

See old friends 

Reach out to old friends and see how they are, catch up over coffee, dinner or a bottle of wine. You never know, they may be feeling the same way as you. 

Cake and coffee with friends

Retail Therapy 

Now I’m not suggesting spending lots of money, for me that’s not an option just now. However window shopping, bargain hunting or even having a wander and rummage at a car boot sale is a great way to spend a morning. I look for second hand books that can be picked up cheap and also things that can go in my growing craft cupboard – I will do a reveal very soon on YouTube! 

Declutter and move things around

Why stay the same? Change is good and while you have a  empty house throw all those broken toys, year old magazines, the tub of random crap that’s by the tumble dryer that everyone promises that they will claim or put away -bin it. Get rid of the old school uniform, reuse old shirts as dusters for around the house and get ready for schools going back soon. I am going to be setting up my office and blogging space this week in the hope to motivate me somewhat. 

Blogging space

Plenty of ideas there to get me through the next couple of weeks. Have you got any suggestions of what else I can busy myself with?  I would love to hear from you in the comments below or in Facebook. 

Enjoy the rest of the summer!!

3 thoughts on “When being alone is hard work

  • It sounds like you’ve got some great plans to utilise your child free time. I always find the first few hours of child free time (shower, eat uninterrupted etc) are great and then I start twiddling my thumbs. I’m no more productive in baby free time either! Look forward to reading about your child free time!

  • Oh wow! I never get any length of time to myself and to be honest, if I did, I probably wouldn’t know what to do with myself. There’s always someone here be it the other half or the boys so I’m always looking after someone. I think I’d actually love to do a swap with you for a while. I don’t have many suggestions for you because the ones you’ve got sound perfect. Just enjoy the time and look forward to having him back home soon xx

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