2016-04-02

Facts about my parents

In memory of my Mum and Dad I have decided to document some of the fun times that I had growing up with my parents in some blog posts.  The first one I have decided to write a list of funny things which have happened while growing up and then use this as a prompt list for more detailed blog posts later on in the year.  Throughout the year I will write about my childhood, growing up, moving house and what I thought was quite normal – but now looking back, it really was not that normal!

My Mum and Dad met and married within six weeks of meeting each other
My Mum got my Dad a dog as a wedding present, called Jerry.  My Dad was called Tom and it took him weeks to work out the connection
My mum believed in aliens, fairies, witches and astral projection – which is being able to leave your body while sleeping and visiting other people
My Mum also believed that if she stared at the TV for long enough she could get it to turn over by itself as everything has “radio waves”
My Mum would try and do backwards rolls in her bedroom at 3am because he spirit guides told her that she could
My Mum had seven spirit guides, at least, who all talked to her
My Dad liked playing practical jokes on people
My Dad would scare children by selotaping his face up into funny faces
My Mum has tried almost every religion going and even left home age five to join the Christian Brethren – she came back a few hours later
My Dad would bribe me into trying new foods when I was younger
My parents had wild parties when I was growing up
We had people stay at our Bed and Breakfast for over a year and became part of the family
My Dad threw one of our B&B guests in a bath full of water fully clothed – just because it would be funny
My Dad used to make riding jackets for the royal family
His clothing designs were purchased from him by a designer in the early 70s to make into leather jackets
My Mum told off Jarvis Cocker for putting his feet up on the coffee table
My Mum grew up in Singapore
My Granny Chris, my Mums, Mum, used to own pubs around Edinburgh and Mum worked there with her when she could20130310_182646
My Mum decided to steal a concrete bin from the street one night and put it in the garden of the house as she liked it
My Mum had a crystal ball which would only work if it was placed in running water, at midnight, on a full moon, so woke me up one night when I was 7 to go and get in the stream at the bottom of the garden with the crystal ball so she did not have to get wet
My mum studied Esoteric Psychology for years but I still do not know what it is
My Dad played the guitar and banjo
My parents had a bad taste party when I was 8, the food was in bad taste, clothes were in bad taste and there was even very bad taste strippers there too….
My Mum was not musical at all but loved Queen and thought that the music was spiritual
My Dad had his own soft furnishings business called Sitting Pretty for 20 years
My Mum could not sew at all even though it was my Dads job and he tried to teach her
My Mum was a published poet
My Dad and his friends used to cheer the neighbours on when they were having sex as they were very loud and always did it with the windows openIMAG0349
I used to sing Leaving on a Jet Plane when I was three with my Dad playing the guitar
My Dad wanted Nathan to be called Sir as his first name
My parents both thought I had joined a cult when I left home aged 17 when I thought I had fallen in love
My Dad had scars on his arms and legs from a bad motorcycle crash, he used to tell people that he was mauled by a Bengal Tiger/He was Frankenstein’s Monster/He stitched himself up on his sewing machine/A bear did it/that they were from being in the war/another story

I think my parents were both bonkers, but they were the best parents in my opinion, even with the nutty comments, the blow up dolls, mad parties, strippers, singing, dancing and minor criminal damage that they both got up to and I love them to bits. I just hope Nathan has as much fun growing up as I did.

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